I sat down in front of the camera recently with a heavy realization. I hit record, and the first words out of my mouth weren’t a pitch, or a strategy, or a success story. They were a confession.
“It’s not everyone who can be an entrepreneur or a CEO. And I know I’m definitely one of them that should not be one.”
For the most part of this year, I have failed.
If we are looking at the scorecard of a traditional CEO, my grades are slipping. I’ve been bad at marketing. I’ve been bad at sales. I’ve struggled to talk to my users. When it comes to managing my team, I’ve been “too nice”—overlooking slack where I should have demanded excellence, failing to sell the vision, and failing to motivate the people looking to me for leadership.
My major task this year was to secure resources for Cver AI. I failed woefully at it. And the worst part? I did it without accountability. I looked away like nothing was wrong.
I look around at my peers—fellow entrepreneurs who started at the same time we started Cver AI. I watch them raise money, gain traction, and hit milestones. Meanwhile, I feel like I’m still here. Way, way behind.
I know the saying: It’s not a race, it’s a marathon. But it’s hard to keep running when you feel like you’re tripping over your own shoelaces.
The Creator vs. The Consumer
Despite the failures, there is a quote I keep on my whiteboard that anchors me: “I am a creator, not a consumer.”
It’s a simple phrase, but it holds layers of meaning for me. I love using other people’s products; I appreciate what they build. But that isn’t enough for me. There is a deep, nagging urge in my spirit to serve people en masse. I want to create something that people love.
I am happy I found this passion. But I am realizing that passion alone doesn’t make the road easy.
The Death of the Shortcut
People who know me well know a dirty little secret about me: I am excellent at finding shortcuts. Throughout my life, I’ve had a knack for finding the path of least resistance and still getting the result—usually faster than everyone else.
But entrepreneurship? This beast has no back door.
I have been desperately looking for a hack, a shortcut, a way to bypass the grind. And I have hit a wall. There is no shortcut to building a company. There is no “easy way” to lead a team. You cannot “growth hack” your way out of the requirement to show up and lead.
The Unfinished Take
If you watch the video I recorded, you’ll notice it cuts off abruptly.
The truth is, I got a phone call that interrupted the recording. My instinct was to delete the footage, set the lighting back up, and do a “Take 2″—a version where I smiled more, stuttered less, and wrapped it up with a motivational bow.
I chose not to.
I didn’t want to polish the struggle. I didn’t want to manufacture a resolution that felt fake. I wanted you to see the messy middle, because that is exactly where I am.
The Conclusion
So, where does that leave me?
It leaves me with a single, undeniable fact. I am fighting the fact that I “shouldn’t” be an entrepreneur by actively learning how to become a good one.
The time for looking for shortcuts is over. The time for excuses is done.
I am sitting down. I am doing the work.
Cver AI restarts next week.
My Video: Instagram